Maybe You're Retarded!

Hey ... hold on, I'm not insulting anybody o. I just remembered an incident in a book I read some time ago. This guy was trying to explain to his bewildered younger brother how cars work and the technology behind them, from an auto engineering point of view. The brother listened politely and would always nod. Then his elder brother asked, "Do you understand?" and he shook his head no. Frustrated, the elder brother retorted, "Maybe you're retarded". How could he not have understood something that simple?  :) I'm sure there were times when you got that  "Are you dumb?" look too. Let me throw in some consolation here ( I need it too, hahaha) - okay, er-mm ... you're pretty smart, afterall none of us are Einstein, except Einstein, right?

Seriously  though, we use laptops, fly in planes, use appliances in our homes, wear designer clothes, shoes and bags, right?  So, how come we don’t bother with understanding the technology behind them? It gets even worse, people can count off their fingers the numerous problems with the environment, our politicians, our economy, our country ... the list is endless. If we would simply bother about the science or reasons behind this, the more likely we would be to press the agencies that are involved in handling them. The less you know about a particular subject matter, the more you are likely to be manipulated or influenced by people who may not have your best interests at heart. Let's at least get a simple understanding of things. We don't even need to have technical expertise. Just have an idea!

The Child Bride Saga

I wasn't going to talk about it because so much had been said already but I realised  I owe my myself, my sisters and every girl child this. I want to lend my voice to this cause.You see, I have four sisters - two of which are in their teens and I consider them still children! Imagine my alarm when I read that every year, an estimated 14 million girls across the world become child brides and in Africa, 42% of girls were married before turning 18. Scary stuff!!

Last week, the Nigerian Senate voted on a constitutional amendment that would have helped protect girls from underage marriage but the clause setting the age of consent at 18 failed.There's been so much outrage among Nigerians - celebrities, groups and NGOs have been campaigning by showing their disdain on twitter, Facebook, blogs and other social media asking the senate to revisit the issue. I'm impressed and proud of the intensity and passion with which they spoke. So I found it funny that one of the lawmakers who voted for this clause, came out to say  he never meant to vote for child marriages. He said he voted in favor of whether a married woman is deemed to be of full age to renounce her Nigerian citizenship and not whether a woman can marry before attaining the age of 18 years. Really? I wonder if he has daughters!

There's More!

The last three months have been the best months of my life when it comes to achieving  some outward lifelong goals.  I’ve been more creative than ever and it doesn’t feel like I’ve worked at all. Spiritually, it’s been ... well, almost  the opposite:) I've come to accept that it's just a season. If someone was watching closely my walk with God, they might not be utterly encouraged but I'm a project with a goal! I've always believed I and God are best friends because I’ve experienced an incredible relationship with Him . Denying this, is like denying that He’s real. But there would always be phases, obstacles. It's not really about the outer conflict, it's the inner conflicts because that's what really shapes us. They mold us.  In fact the only reason I’ll respect anyone is their honesty about their doubts and struggles, if someone doesn’t have those, then I cannot relate to that. There is grace for rising after falling. This is the gospel that we are supposed to be living.

What I’m saying is that, it’s not just about your good morals, singing and listening to gospel songs, regularly being at that bible study meeting , dressing conservatively or being on that  missions trip. It’s about God being your goal because all the seasons of struggle, doubt, despair, victory, defeat and faith are just parts in the whole story. I hope these all makes sense but you are welcome to disagree.

While growing up, I had "role models" - people I wanted to be like and impress so much. I would have done anything to be like them. But if I had just stopped worrying about that and believed in how unique and special I was. And just enjoyed the inspiration I got from their lives and not worry about trying too hard to be like them, I would have maybe become even more successful. I'm sure, more than anything, the Lord wants us to just spend time with Him and enjoy what we share and stop trying desperately to impress Him with works or activities.

PS: I  have some people to thank for these recent changes.You know yourselves :) Thanks for giving your services as gifts to help support my cause for this blog and my other goals.

Much Love

Ibe

Gratitude Doesn't Even Describe It - PART 2

Life on the sick bed wasn't all medicines, IVs and injections. On my bedside table were several get well cards. There was the ever squeaking shoes of the nurses. They also giggled and laughed all the time at their station even when people were dying! Anyone who has been in the hospital, even if it's just overnight, knows that you never sleep very well because almost every hour a nurse comes in and has to do something! :) Then there was me in that odd gown and sweet-smelling talcum powder all over my body because I could get bedsores from prolonged immobility. 

This hospital, like most, was spotlessly clean yet, I could smell sickness and disinfectant in the air - I was assaulted by it from the first day I was brought in in that wheelchair. But it paled in comparism to the real problem - there were injured people everywhere. Some of them would never get better. I knew because I saw it in their eyes! 

I'd been sleeping one night when I first became aware of the commotion. Distant and muffled cries coming from down the hall. I could barely make out the words. "She's dead o" Voice one said. Then, "Where's her mum?" Voice two asked. I glanced over but I couldn't really see anything as I was tied to the bed. At that point, I just wished I could go for a walk to clear my head.

There were happier times too. One time, I had my close friends visit and we relieved funny stories. Funny images were planted in my head and the follow-through was tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard!

To be continued ...

Gratitude Doesn't Even Describe It - PART 1

I have always thought about writing about a cherished and life-affirming period of my life. It's a true-life story and it's going to be in series. I hope I get to encourage and inspire you with it. Here's my story:

 Gratitude Doesn't Even Describe It - PART 1

One day, some months after my twentieth birthday while I was lying on the hospital bed with my right leg hanging, writing in my diary about my many dreams, I realised something. I may never walk again. Surprisingly, I wasn't scared - I was numb of all feelings except that burning sensation in my fractured leg. It was as if I could feel the blood vessels vibrating. But I ignored it. I couldn't also pray the whole time. I thought it was odd that I felt this way but I couldn't help it.

Me & my hot legs! hahaha

I saw someone coming in. I knew it was my Dad. No one else was allowed to see me at six in the morning. I looked up and for a beat he looked at me with an expression that seemed like sadness. Everyone seemed to wear sombre looks. I was used to it. He sat beside my bed and I continued writing. I wrote about how I imagined being that CEO, only right now, I didn't believe it!

A moment later, I thought back to one night, a year ago. My room mate and I were discussing. She kept saying that it couldn't be stopped. "What?" I had asked. "Accidents, sicknesses and especially death." She spoke slowly, her teeth seemed clenched, eyes focused straight up at the ceiling. When I pressed her for more, she said, "I'm afraid I'll end up just killing myself." At that time it had given me shivers, a clammy feeling ran throughout my body. But  I talked myself out of it saying she was only being dramatic.

Well, here I was a victim of accident - one of the things she talked about! More than anything I wanted to break free. I worried that I might remain tied to that bed. I was stuck. So I figured if I couldn't change the situation, maybe I could pretend it wasn't happening. And I decided that what I needed were books and a small radio. And I made my dad get them.  I would exchange novels with one of my favourite nurses. The books were my ticket out of whatever I thought I was in.

To be continued ...

Life Can Still be Fun!

Life Can Still be Fun!

Hi folks. So… I’m very excited that I have an another opportunity to start afresh! How was your weekend? Mine was uneventful - not boring but really quiet - I took time to rest and prepare for the new week. Thinking of which, how come Mondays come too quickly and Fridays take too long to come? Funny right? Could that mean that we are lazy people, who would rather play (or rest) than work? :)

I was talking with my friend Z some time ago and  I said "... but God rested!" His response was thought-provoking - "It would be unfair for you to imply that He rested in between work. He rested after He was done with His work ." You are welcome to disagree like I did.  You see, it can be a choice between two good options. Should I keep working till everything is alright before I even consider resting? Or can I take rests intermittently?

I know, work in itself is unavoidable or else we would starve, be stagnant and be redundant. Of course the first justification is this is what God commanded. In the book of Genesis, it is recorded that after Adam sinned, God gave mankind the world and everything in it and commanded the use of this gift- we were condemned commanded to work :) It is therefore assumed that if we work more, we would eventually attain a sort of happiness and fulfillment. I agree, idleness and inefficiency is foolish but it would be too simple to conclude that because someone desires flexibility and rest in working schedules, they ae trading some ambition and prestige in exchange - they're just willing to trade it for the moment!

Like my friend Z, continuous work may give you some satisfaction but it may be temporal and full of anxiety. Yes, I'm for diligence, resilience, discipline and hardwork . At least then, you would have a valid reason to rest. What is more, any concession you make, make sure you get something in return to justify it. Have a beautiful week!

Much love

Ibe

I've Got Some Sew-cial Skills!

I've Got Some Sew-cial Skills!

 

I've been agonizing for hours, thinking of a grand opening statement that will hit you like a bomb! Something so brilliant, so interesting, it'll make you want to eat my blog. But sadly, I’ve been typing words only for work related things since yesterday. Now, I feel I am ready to write again, just for the sake of writing. And if you indulge me, I would love to once more share my random ramblings with you.

You see,  my interests tend to run in different directions. I always try to understand everything and I've actually  learnt a little about a lot of things.  Once, I enrolled to learn about fashion designing while waiting to get into the university. I didn't get to finish though but I can't wait to learn more and show off my sew-cial skills! hahaha. For now, I'll make do with exploring fashion designing sites. I also love sketching things, anything. Yet, I'm still not an expert. Some of my sketches are  funny, some thought provoking, and others are just down-right stupid! Subsequently I'll be showing you some of my sketches. That's not even all... I'm beginning to believe that I'm a philomath. Don't worry,  it's not some sort of dreadful disease! I find myself in this position all the time and sometimes it's hard "finding my place". I hope I have sha!

I'm working on learning a new skill to the point of mastery. Until then, I promise to be a responsible blogger hehehe! I'm excited to hear from each one of you, so please feel free to drop me a line on the comments box. 

Much love

 Ibe

Imagine My Shock!

Imagine My Shock!

 

Wow, you talk/ look/ laugh/ walk just like your Dad!

Familiar, right?  I'm getting a little nostalgic and misty-eyed here. You see, my mum used to speak to herself especially in the shower. I disliked  it. Well, I just found out I'm doing same! Ok, I'm a little worried about this one (I got other things from her too) and I know what you're thinking: big deal. I mean, it's not that bad! :(

My mum could also obsess for the whole world! And I have come to acknowledge that it's usually hard for me to achieve anything great without being just a little bit obsessed with it. Infact,  I've always believed obsession can lead to greatness! :) But when exactly can we say obsession is too much? Ok, I know what you're going to say, don't bother - I'm learning to take things slowly.

Fair enough. I get it. It's isn't really a bad thing to take after one's parent(s) - some of these traits have been  beneficial to us but I also know  some  may emerge problematic to us and our relationships with others. Either way, we should be thankful for having had the opportunity to learn from their imperfections. Come to think of it, we weren't even given the priviledge to choose what gene to  accept or reject - there was no way to know which traits would eventually pop up in us. I hope, this brings you some comfort. I know it does for me. 

PS: Please keep in mind that this post is not intended to keep fueling the need to place the blame on our parents for every wrong thing going on in our lives, but rather, to gain a better understanding of our own behaviour.

So, let's get a little chatty here - what trait(s) from your parents have helped you become a better person and which would you rather do without?

Much love
Ibe

MERCY!

MERCY!

 

"Who was before a blasphemer, and a persecutor, and injurious:
 but obtained mercy, because I did it ignorantly in unbelief" 1 Tim 1:13

When you think MERCY, do you think of someone's name? Does it  mean we really could "get away with" sin, or does Mercy imply that we had no hope on the score of justice?  For me, when thinking about the true definition of MERCY or at least in the context of God's mercy towards us, it feels a lot like the same judge letting you go, after finding you guilty! :)

I am a grateful product of God's mercy!  Every time I hear stories about other people who are struggling with sin and guilt, people who've been dubbed as messed up and hopeless - I always close my eyes and remember how it was for me to be in that place too. I still find myself there from time to time, it's never really smooth sailing all the way, but then I'm pulled out of it - again, only by God's mercy. It is something I can never ever work for or earn, it is simply a gift given lovingly by God to those who receive it wholeheartedly.

Just Hanging Around!

Just Hanging Around!

 

I have been writing all morning, but at this rate, it will be hours before I publish my next article. My eyes sting - how I long for my bed! I make stories in my mind all the time, but why is it sometimes difficult to put words to thoughts? :) Ahhh! I can hear someone laughing in the next room; I can't deny it's familiar. It sounds very much like one from someone I know. Yes! Judith, that's how she laughs!

I remember I used to get this question a lot - “Are you related to Judith?”. Judith had been a next-door neighbour when I was serving this great nation :). She was pretty and fair skinned, just like me ... hahaha. I just had to be her sister; she was same height and same eyes ( I believe the eyes bit though) as me. But we weren't sisters. They didn´t believe that. I would get frustrated looks, “Are you serious?”. I would smile as if knowing something that they don´t, but so obvious that I should. Then I would go - "Don't worry I would ask my mum"  but this time they giggled.

Okay, to the present. I'm currently reading “Beyond The Fall Of The Night” by Arthur C. Clarke and Gregory Benford. If you've ever given a thought to the thereafter, then this is the book for you.  I stumbled into some amazing and mysterious adventure involving the few people left on earth after everyone else disappeared! Hahaha.... scary! But seriously, what are the chances of the entire human species disappearing entirely (ofcourse with the exception of the rapture o)?

Err, let' me rest a bit while you think about that. Thanks, as always, for reading and stopping by and commenting.  Have a fun-filled weekend!

Much love,
Ibe

What Is It About Fashion Anyway?

What Is It About Fashion Anyway?

 

Like most ladies, I love to dress pretty and look good. Dresses, especially short ones are my specialty...lols! I also love to wear pencil skirts, they are just so flattering, especially with heels. They give you that sleek and elegant look! There's always something classy about sticking to what suits you. For me, clothes make a strong visual statement about how you see yourself, you can't go about dressed up like a carpenter designed your dress! Haba! 

However, my fondness for nice fashion statements does not take the place of  common sense. I have chosen to live within my means and spend the money I actually have on things I actually can afford. It's not that I have a great disdain for high end fashion items. I love the fact that I can still pull off a decent look without going broke. Who knows, someday, I might be able to splurge on a Louis Vuitton bag and Christian Louboutin shoes!   

I don't claim to be an expert on fashion o but these tips have worked for me:

Why Do You Like Football?

Why Do You Like Football?

 

I saw a snippet of yesterday's match that had the Nigeria’s Flying Eagles losing out to the Uruguay U-20 national team at the FIFA U-20 World Cup holding in Turkey. I also learnt the  loss to Uruguay was the second in less than two weeks after the Super Eagles also lost to the South American nation at the FIFA Confederations Cup in Brazil.

The loss was painful but my empathetic nature makes me appreciate their efforts. I mean, these guys (footballers) push the boundaries of human performance - they are regularly involved in things that are simply physically unavailable to the rest of us. I have my concerns though; I think only non-sports types ( especially those of us who are not football freaks)  would understand. I still don't get why people would huddle close together (most probably in a bar or viewing centre) with people they don't know in front of a massive plasma TV screen  while watching people they equally don't know, passing around a ball! The action is always too fast and I don't get to hear a word the football commentators say! How about the thunderous shouts from adoring fans throughout the neighbourhood as each goal is scored? The hype alone gives me an adrenaline rush. It worries  me to tears when the Nigerian team is losing out! :)

MIND YOUR BUSINESS!

MIND YOUR BUSINESS! 

 

I don't like busy-bodies (does anyone even like them?) but minding one's business isn't exactly possible these days. Try minding your business and you're most likely to be  perceived as being aloof and boring! I know, no right thinking person would  appreciate anyone meddling in their affairs but I believe minding one's business doesn't have to mean indifference or turning a blind eye to issues or people - it should mean dealing with issues with firm convictions while being careful on where to draw the line. It doesn't also mean living an uneventful life, in fact, God challenges us to go out there to make a statement by living a life of purpose and excellence. I personally believe life should be free of envy for others, anger, greed, and all the other negativity we have to put up with daily. I'm a dreamer, right? :) 

HAPPY NEW MONTH!

HAPPY NEW MONTH!

 

Happy New Month friends! I'm so grateful  we made to the first day of the second half of the year! I'm curious though. How far have you gone with your New Year resolutions? Were you able to get anything done? Are things not going quite as you had planned? Are you becoming a little impatient?

I know, it could feel quite normal to just sulk and feel bad but if we can't keep living that way, right? If we do, then we're likely to have more bad than good days and consequently a bad year. Just remember, striving to make things better doesn't always mean to feel good.We have to learn to adapt to the unexpected and uncomfortable aspects of life while working towards changing them.

I noticed how much impatience, anger and worry (specifically mine) halts or even slows down the pace of achieving set goals. So, friends, let's choose to be strong in the face of challenges because they are inevitable. Remember, there's work to be done, goals to achieve, people to encourage and lessons to learn.

Here's my sincere prayer for you today and the rest of the year - "And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us: and establish thou the work of our hands upon us;the work of our hands establish thou it" Psalm 90:17

So with that in mind, have a truly awesome day, week and month!

Much love,

Ibe